Who Said Accountants Have No Humor?

Every year, when I get to a certain part in one of my courses, I tell the only joke that I know about finance/accounting:

  • What’s the difference between a guy and a bond?
    • Bonds mature

So this past year when I told it, I felt it had loste, the Internet was some of its appeal, or maybe it was all in the delivery.

o I decided to see if I could find some new jokes realted to teh noble profession of accounting. And as you can imagine, the Internet was more than willing to help with such a quest.

I soon realized that I could be reading accounting jokes fro the next few days If I checked out every link and read every joke. As a result, I just took at the jokes on the first site I came across, and I thought I’d share a few of my favorites:

  • What do you call a trial balance that doesn’t balance? A late night.
  • It’s accrual world.
  • Where do homeless accountants live? In a tax shelter.

Four Laws of Accounting

  1. Trial balances don’t.
  2. Bank reconciliations never do.
  3. Working capital does not. 
  4. Return on investments never will.
  • What do you call a financial controller who always works through lunch, takes two days holiday every two years, is in the office every weekend, and leaves every night after 10 p.m.? Lazy.
  • Have you heard the joke about the interesting accountant? No. Me neither.
  • If an accountant’s wife cannot sleep, what does she say? “Darling, could you tell me about your work.”
  • There are 3 types of accountants. Those who can count and those who can’t.

I think that’s enough tomfoolery for now, and I’m sure you need a break from your hysterical laughing.

P.S. In keeping with the concept of full disclosure, I need to point out that I did use a second site for some of the jokes shown above…

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Jim Borden

Accounting Prof. at Villanova; happily married for 30+ years; father of 3 outstanding young men; vegan; interests: fitness, creativity, education, blogging, social media.

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